Transcribed by: Caitlin Carr

Zoe: Hey everyone welcome to the last episode for season 2 of lemonade I'm here with my usual besties London and Bethany and- hold on I didn't say my name sorry sorry. 

Bethany: Your doing fine I don't know why you stopped. 

Zoe: Oh cause I didn't introduced myself, I skipped that. I skipped over that 

Bethany: I got it done, I’m here with my besties Bethany and London and I’m Zoe the CEO of blah blah blah

Zoe: Oh yeah, well ok… <chuckle> anyways. 

London: You don't always have to be first zoe!

Bethany: God zoe! 

London: Singular host.

Zoe: Yeah but like I could be!

Bethany: But I could be!… jesus. 

Zoe: <Laughs>

London: The singular speaker.

Zoe: Listen for all this hard work that  i have to do creating an intro i better be first . <laughs> 

Bethany:  Yeah, yeah,yeah,  mmm really mmm, noted, I'll just click outta here I guess Zoe can run it by herself. 

Zoe: <laughs> 

(disconnect sound) 

Zoe: I personally love lemon, but anyways 

Bethany: We all love lemons over  here at Squirt Well called it Squirt for a reason ladies ome on ladies. <exaggerated laugh> 

Zoe: Squirt. 

Bethany: Somebody who was just thinking of the lemon think is sitting there like….”ohhh.” 

Zoe: Ohhh it's not a lemon?!

Bethany: -Right now just having the realization, like “ohh”

Zoe: No baby, it's my drink… and not the soda.

Everyone: <laughs>

Zoe: I’m Zoe the CEO- anyways um <laughs> Fuck. 

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London: Like the fisting, that was for pleasure , fine, that one- like bottle that was like, I can't believe yall are doing that to your vaginas 

Zoe: You know what if Envy ever decides to make a wine bottle company, you know thats coming up. 

Bethany: They're gonna make like vagina safe wine bottles in the future. The pussy pro-

Thats what we’ll call our wine company: Pussy proof

Zoe: <gasps> Pussy Proff,  oh my- someone put that down, someone write that down quick. 

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Zoe: Is that a man cough in the back. Who is that? 

London: Yeah I heard someone coughing  too

Bethany: Yeah thats my  Cody in the back. 

Zoe: Hi Cody! 

Zoe: Hi Cody!

Bethany: yeah they heard you coughing 

London & Zoe: <laughs> 

Bethany: Hold on their saying hi let me unplug my headphones.

Cody: I'll take smoother hits next time I apologize. 

London: Thank you!

Zoe: No your good, I  was  just like, who is that, theirs a man in here, i dont understand

 Bethany: Your breaking up the feminine energy 

Zoe: exactly <laughs> 

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Zoe: I don't have enough time.. anyways someone need to get masterbated and thats me 

London: it's the hysteria 

Zoe: <laughs> 

Bethany: It's the hysteria. You know what i want, what I wish, I want a lobotomy like can yall just like click click that shit out of ny head. Like sometimes I sit there and  I'm like,  I bet being lobotmized is nice, you just sitting there vibing. 

Zoe: <laughs

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Zoe: You cant fuck with us 

London Exactly 

Zoe: Some one just wearing fucking like killstars like just absoluste fucking curb stompers yeah thats it 

Bethany I feel would like uh, on the, uhh, the public platform that we in fact do not plan on curb stomping or using weapons against anyone. 

Zoe: Mmm, we might…

Bethany: Please dont say that. Hey Zoe dont say we might shut the fuck up 

Zoe: Listen, few- 

Bethany: NSA is like tracing 

London: Allegedly, we wont do those things 

Zoe: Allegedly. 

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Bethany: Like how liong until i gotta start watching ads before I can use my fucking toys

Zoe: Yeah thats real.

Bethany: It's gonna be like- 

Zoe: Capitalism at it again. 

 Bethany: -This ad is brought to you by the home depot, like- 

Zoe: <laughs> Come again soon! 

Bethany: Live more, get it better like idk get wetter, whatever the fuck they want to put as the slogan on vibrators 

Zoe: Live more, get wetter 

Bethany: But  like-

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Zoe: So what im hearing is that Cody would be great to have on the team.. In the future

Bethany: Yeah Cody do you want an intern gig darling?! I know that your doing security later

London: <Gasps> Is he gonna wear a skirts, is he gonna wear a skirt? Our uniform is gonna be skirt

Zoe:  Do we have skirts, or-I thought it was everyone was dressed up in like a latex getup

London: Yes but it's a latex shirt. So I need to be in like booty shorts or a latex skirt. 

Bethany: Um so, so, so, Cody’s responds to will he wear a skirt, is it wouldn't be the first time

London: Ok that's great. It’s either, I think-

Zoe: Would it be the first time for a latex skirt?! <laughs>

London: I think the uniform gonna be like a skirt or booty shorts, like those are your options. But like pants you cant wear pants thats a part of-

Bethany: Or you can have booty shorts. 

London: As security you can't wear pants, You have to be sexy to be able to distract people. 

Zoe: <laughs> 

Bethany: I feel like booty short would be better! I wanna see him walking around in like booty short

Zoe: <laughs>

London: We have to distract people with our sexy next then attack them

Zoe: <laughs>

Bethany: but like he looks like a mall cop from the top up and then just like the hot pants on the bottom 

London & Zoe: <Laughs>

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Zoe: Thank you <laughs> for research purposes 

London: Hr checks our emails there like what the fuck 

Zoe: Literealy 

London: Its just bethany, shes our hr, shes like come on guys

Zoe: And the notes like-

Bethany I have the write the email later scolding you both, yeah I know 

Zoe: is it bad if its like: London you have my permission to send me the p*** you find. Is that loud. <laughs>

Bethany: I mean thats kinda bad of both of you, that why i have to yell at you both 

Zoe: Fair enough 

London: Where like this is research for the podcast…

Zoe & London: <laughs> 

London: just researching 

(disconnect sound) 

Bethany: Ohio, Iowa, whatever.

Zoe: yeah bitch we got fucking corn instead of potatos, excuse you!

Bethany: Yeah excuse me, I’m sorry..

London: Corn versus potato war. 

Zoe: I will be front like in that war!

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Zoe: The foreskin story. Four skins in seven night ago <laughs> 

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Zoe: Um that's not really a thing i'm in to…. I can fist you… don’t come at me- 

London: Zoe…ok I don't know if fisting- I don't know if this is TMI…

Everyone: <Laughs> 

London: I went down a rabbit hole- 

Zoe: Yeah! 

London: and I was like, you know wha when I imagine it in my head, i was like, it was so much worse then actually seeing it.

Zoe: Yeah, it’s kinda hot. 

London: It's not but worse that having a dick in you 

Zoe: Yeah exactly 

Bethany Im so red right now you guys.. 

London & Zoe: <laughs>

Zoe: So I found out that london has a breeding kink- 

London No I just wanted to say that because, I forgot but you reminded me, definitely I went down a little fisting rabibit hole-

Zoe: It's a fun time! 

Bethany: You know I just edited an episode where London was talking about her going down a bad dragon rabbit hole so i feel like we learning so much about her and her preference. 

Zoe: True 

London: I go down rabbit holes and I don't stop even when I should.

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 London: Let’s expose you Zoe, have you ever driven under the influence 

Zoe: Uh yeah for sure. <laughs> 

London: Ooh ok I love that for you. 

Bethany: Ooh that's bad, don't root for it.

Zoe: I know thasts bad, I know it’s bad 

Bethany: No no I’m not saying you should lie but London literally over here like, “I love that for you,”- 

London & Zoe: <inaudible>

Bethany:- and im like its one thing to be to <inaudible> but another to be like: yeah DUI woo,” like what the- 

London: I realized it and didn't even really think about what she had said-

Bethany & Zoe: <laughs> 

London: -And I was just like, “ I love that for you,” but thinking about it, um no don't drive under the influence kids it's very bad, please don't be like Zoe over here, learn from her mistakes.

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Zoe: Any of you have a pool, I’ll go skinny dipping 

Hey hey dont make me have to call HR 

London: we.. made HR 

Everyone: <laughs> 

London: immediately <laughs> Zoe’s  gonna me like, “you can come however, whatever, have everything hanging, have everything just out, lets go!”

Bethany: Fucking bitch out, like lets go. 

Zoe: you’ll see theres like a kiddy pool in the middle of the office one day and it's like me showing up with no kid and everyones like, “ what the fuck,”- 

Bethany: <laughs>

Zoe: im like, “ we’re going skinny dipping today you guys?! <laughs>

Bethany: <laughs> 

Zoe: <inaudible> ….always popping my p****

Bethany: <histerical laughter> 

Zoe & London: <Laughs>

London: Everyone’s just like” we wanted to come to work today Zoe what they fuc-” 

Bethany: Oh my god, I'm gonna call in sick that day you guys…

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London: Imagine that im trynna sleep have a good night rest and this n**** trynna- oop, im getting a little oop- but he trynna come in- <laughs>, got a little too casual 

Bethany: No your fine it's ok, I’d cut it if one of us said it, but i dont care if you say it, I don't know if thats a double standard or something

London: If one of us say it <laughs 

Zoe: If someone else say it they’re not working here!

Bethany: No your fine I don't care i mean I'll cut it if you would like me too that's fine 

London: No I dont care I was just like ooh- no I was just shocked because I was like ohh London you got casual, real casual, real quick but like it is late and I'm tired so whatever 

Bethany: I like that you feel like you can get casual with us, like were friends.  

London Um we are friends come on we know about each other pus****

Bethany: Promise that were friends not coworkers anymore cause thats is a problem when we record sometimes 

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Zoe: are you gonna ready the first one?

Bethany: Yes hold on?

Zoe: oh ok. 

Bethany….sheesh

Zoe: Sorry I didn't know what was happening, I was like, “should I?”

Bethany: its ok its fine 

London: Zoe said do your job

Bethany: I am doing my job, we're all here arent I?!

London: Your doing amazing!

Bethany: I know that you for noticing!

(disconnect sound) 

Bethany: Every year judged scope out the neighboor and decides who has the more festive home. Everyone who has- oh (jumbled words) anyone- everyone- oh my god fuck me, I gotta take a hit hold on, that’s my problem

Zoe: <laughs> 

(disconnect sound) 

London: Gotta be a momma, gotta be a mom-trepreneur 

More coming soon!